Purchase David Acuff's brand new sci-fi epic "Battle Tides" from Amazon $19.99

EXCERPT…

Today we’d like to introduce you to David Acuff.

Hi David, thanks for sharing your story with us. To start, maybe you can tell our readers some of your backstory.
I am a semi-centurion. And no, Dylan, it has nothing to do with CrossFit. It’s just a great word I made up when I recently turned 50 years old because “quinquagenarian” sounded like a horse disease or a Menudo song. Fifty years is a long time to futz around planet earth making up words. In that time I’ve lived, I’ve laughed, I’ve loved and lost, I’ve litigated and lactated and alliterated.

Today I’m a Hollywood insider, a southerner, a military brat, a sit-down comic, a piano recital survivor, a BMW murderer, a dog licker, a divorced TikTok’er, a father of three adult Jedi Princesses and possibly a child prodigy (MENSA won’t return my calls).

For most of my production career I was in North Carolina. As a Producer-Editor my bread-and-butter was corporate videos, wedding videos and dance recital videos of two-year-olds falling gracefully across the stage like weeble wobbles. A lot more plop than plié. In 2014 I traded in tractor videos and bridezillas for Hollywood and hobos. I’ve now been in LA for 10 years this month (August).

My second year out here I was drafted by the House of Mouse and worked at Disney for seven years. Got to see inside the sausage factory as it were. And believe me it’s not all box office hits and bippity boppity boos. And very little sausage. But I did get to attend the Oscars, and sat with the Ms. Maisel crew at the Emmy’s when they won a bunch of awards their first year. I’ve gotten to interview cool people like Kristen Bell and Jessica Biel.

Once I had the full-time job and rent was being paid and I was eating on a regular basis again, Los Angeles got to be a lot more fun. I got to explore more. I got into standup Comedy at Flappers and Comedy Store. Did some voiceover work as The Beaver in the “Family Camp” movie. Edited a Nicolas Cage trailer called “Vengeance: A Love Story.” Went on a date with a verified blue-check mark. Well I called it a date, I think she just thought I was her Uber driver. I’ve had craft beers with Wil Wheaton.

And, yes, I know I called myself a Hollywood Insider but not quite. I’d like to be Showrunning a quirky half-hour dramedy or selling my Christmas Horror Comedy Script to Ryan Reynolds to produce. But I’m not *that* inside yet. I’m more like the gum on the bottom of Blake Lively’s Louboutins. But I consider that “insider-adjacent.”

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